Thankfully, zombiologist John Austin details everything you need to know, as a newly undead soul, to hunt, fight, and feed on the living. As the first handbook written specifically for the undead, explains how you ended up in this predicament, the stages of zombification, and what you need to survive in this zombiphobic world. Dozens of helpful diagrams outline attack strategies, such as the Ghoul Reach, the Flanking Zack, the Bite Hold, and the Aerial Fall, to secure your human prey. You’ll even learn how to successfully extract the living from boarded up farmhouses and broken down vehicles.
As of this writing, face-eating killer zombie Austin Harrouff is resting comfortably at a local hospital in stable condition after surgery on his hand for a self-inflicted injury. It seems he nearly sliced off one of his own fingers during all that frenzied stabbing. Still no word on why he didn’t just bite it off and eat it, though.